Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers.

Consider this scripture.

2 Corinthians 6:14-16 (NKJV)

            Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? 15 And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever? 16 And what agreement has the temple of God with idols? For you are the temple of the living God. As God has said: “I will dwell in them and walk among them. I will be their God, and they shall be My people.” 

            What picture comes into your mind when you read these verses? Most people envision an oxcart with 2 oxen yoked together to pull the cart. In their vision one of the oxen is unstable and disrupts the team work and so the cart cannot be properly pulled. Does that sound familiar? Well, let me tell you this; that is the wrong example and it is not what this scripture is describing at all. When 2 oxen are yoked together it is not a case of being unequally yoked together. You see, to yoke 2 oxen together is perfectly normal and they are not unequally yoked.

            They belong yoked together. Just like 2 Christians who are yoked together in marriage. They would not be unequally yoked together. To yoke a team of animals together unequally would be to yoke together an ox and a horse. Or for that matter, a Clydesdale horse and a Shetland pony. As you can see, these are “unequally yoked”. Common sense tells us they could not properly work together. This is also an Old Testament principle found in Deut. 22:10. “You shall not plow with an ox and a donkey together. To be unequally yoked together never works out for the Christian.

            To be yoked together is a very special type of union. It is a union where 2 are expected to have equal respect and responsibility in their specific part of the union. This includes marriage and it could also include a joint business venture such as a grocery store. Suppose a Christian and a non-Christian go in business together and open a grocery store and suppose they have an agreement that both of them have the same and equal authority in the business. And then suppose the non-Christian was to decide that they need to start selling beer and alcohol drinks. Now what is the Christian’s proper action to that situation? The answer is in the text we have been reading.

2 Corinthians 6:17 (NKJV) Therefore “Come out from among them and be separate, says the Lord. Do not touch what is unclean, and I will receive you.” 

            This alone shows the common sense of God’s rule about being “Unequally yoked together with non-believers”.

            At this stage in our understanding of these Scriptures it is pretty clear what these verses mean. Do not be unequally yoked with non-believers means just what it says and I think we would all say it makes perfect good sense.

            To be yoked to a non-believer drags a Christian down and limits his Christian life. There could be some exceptions where a Christian would be so strong in their faith and influence that the non-Christian would not have any influence on their life. But this individual is not the average person. This would be especially true for a woman. She would not have the authority to dominate her husband and so her Christian life would surely be affected.

            Do not marry a non-Christian and do not hesitate to advise others not to marry a non-Christian. To do so is to be unequally yoked together. 

            This scripture poses a problem for members and elders alike. Does this apply to marriage? If it does, is it sinful for a Christian to marry a non-Christian? And what if they marry anyway; what are they to do? These questions have plagued members of the church of Christ for many years and the solutions are tough and hard and very difficult for many people to have to deal with.

            One thing that is clear here is that these instructions do apply to marriage. Verse 15 asks the question, “Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever?” However, this touches the lives of so many people that honoring this command becomes more than many are willing to do. And in many cases people find ways to weaken this command on marriage and attempt to find alternate ways to explain what Paul means when he says “Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers”.

            It is very unfortunate but over the past many years many of the great patriarchs of the church have struggled with the ability to allow these Scriptures to apply to a Christian marrying a non-believer.

            The reason is clear. Frankly, I struggle with it myself. Preachers, elders, and members have struggled with “how do you handle” a family when they have violated or intend to violate this command. “Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers”.

            There are 2 categories to be considered here. The first category is when a family exists where only one of the spouses becomes a Christian and is added to the church.

            The answer to this is covered in 1 Corinthians 7:12-14 (NKJV) But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her. 13 And a woman who has a husband, who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him.

14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy.

            In order to understand this statement properly, you must consider the context where these statements are made. Paul is writing to the Christians at the church in Corinth about marriage. He first tells them that they would be better off if they did not get married at all.

            This is because of the persecution that the Christians were having to endure at that time period in history. Nevertheless, to those Christians who were married he gives instructions to them in 1 Corinthians 7:10-11 (NKJV) Now to the married (Christians in the church) I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. 11 But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife.

            Now notice his next category of instructions.

1 Corinthians 7:12-14 (NKJV) But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe. Do you see that he now addresses another category? He says, “but to the rest”. Now who are the rest? This is another category in the church at Corinth. These are the people where they were both non-Christians and only one was converted and added to the church. These are the rest. Paul has special instructions for them. They are to stay together if at all possible, but if the non-believer departs let him depart. The Christian is not bound to the marriage duties if they depart. This does not say that the Christian can remarry, but they do not have to fulfill the duties as a spouse.

            Why would Paul have to tell the Christian what to do when married to a non-believer? Because they fall under the category of being unequally yoked to a non-believer.

            Now what do we know that the category called “the rest”? These are those where only one had found the church and became a Christian?

            Look at the verses that follow those we quoted. Remember, we are still following the context of what we are reading about.

1 Corinthians 7:17-20 (NKJV) But as God has distributed to each one, as the Lord has called each one, so let him walk. And so I ordain in all the churches. 18 Was anyone called while circumcised? Let him not become uncircumcised. Was anyone called while uncircumcised? Let him not be circumcised. 19 Circumcision is nothing and uncircumcision is nothing, but keeping the commandments of God is what matters. 20 Let each one remain in the same calling in which he was called.

            So, were you called unequally yoked together with an unbeliever; then Paul has special instructions for you.

          Now there is a second category, also.

          You see, it is one thing to come into the church “already yoked to a non-believer”. But it is something else again to blatantly violate God’s command and intentionally marry a non-Christian anyway.

            There could be a Christian in the church who wants to marry a non-believer. Now this is a correctable situation. Just don’t do it! Elders, preachers, members alike need to be comfortable in being confident in advising and telling a Christian “do not marry a non-believer”. If necessary, let’s put up a billboard in the churches and say, “do not marry a non-believer”. (You realize this is hyperbole)

            However, it is unfortunate, but Christians do this anyway!!!!!

            Now what do we do?

            This is the part where preachers and elders have struggled with the answers for all these years. I struggle too. And so do you or you wouldn’t be reading this article.

            Paul gives his instructions for cases where Christian members of the church disobey this command, “Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers”.

            Look at his solution in 2 Corinthians 6:17 (NKJV) Therefore “Come out from among them and be separate, says the Lord. Do not touch what is unclean, and I will receive you.”

            Can you see why this is hard medicine to take? I think you can and I think everyone can. In fact, many just won’t take this medicine. It is the same way when it comes to light in a congregation that 2 people have an improper divorce and remarriage. Many elders and preachers will lead their congregations in just ignoring an improper marriage. The same is true when people refuse to obey the command, “do not be unequally yoked together with an unbeliever”.

            Now this situation is not quite equal to an improper divorce and remarriage; where remarriage is not a possible answer.

            There is another solution. The spouse could become a Christian.

            So there are 2 possible solutions for a situation where a Christian marries a non-believer. It is clear that they are living in sin by violating the command not to yoke themselves to a non-believer. But the non-believer can repent and become a Christian. This is not like an improper divorce where they cannot repent and correct the adultery. In that case, separation is the only solution without the option of being able to remarry. But not so with a Christian who violates the command not to be unequally yoked together. The non-believer can repent and become a Christian. At that stage, both would need to repent of the sin of violating a command of God. 

            The conclusion is this; do not become unequally yoked to a non-believer.

This especially means marriage.

            This does not mean working at a job where the boss is a non-Christian. Although it could if your duties included being involved in non-Christian behavior. Nor does it mean that as an owner of a company that all your employees will be fellow Christians. However, your rules will be expected to keep any non-Christian behavior under control.

Carl O. Cooper